Patience Is A Virtue I Don't Possess

What a day this has been.  Aiden had today off for a teacher's comp day so I had planned on heading to 'the big city' to get him some soccer cleats and Andy some new jeans.  Yesterday the meat locker that we took our deer meat to called to say it was done.  They want it picked up within a week, understandably, which meant we had 3 options to get it.  1.) I go w/ the boys today.  2.)  Andy goes tomorrow morning and misses Aiden's first soccer game.  3.)  Andy takes off an afternoon next week to get it.  Well, option 3 isn't really an option at this time, and he didn't want to miss the soccer game which left option 1.  Alrighty then, now my 40 min drive to 'the big city' was going to be an hour and 40 minute drive to Timbuktu Middle of Nowhere to get this meat.  Since there is an even bigger 'big city' between here and there I opted to stop there to get our list of junk before continuing to head on to get that meat.  The boys did really well with the long car ride but I was definitely at my wit's end by the time we stopped for lunch on our way home.  Here's the long and short of it -- I have a short (very short) fuse when it comes to the boys fighting.  And once my short fuse has been lit, small thing makes it burn faster. 

Let's see, they started fighting about 25 minutes into the drive over who could play with Aiden's Leapster handheld game.  Ugh.  I was short on sleep since Brennan came tearing into our room around midnight terrified of the thunder. He slept in our bed the rest of night, which means I was awake off and on all night.  So, lack of sleep + fighting= crabby mommy.  Ok, they started fighting right away, then when they decided to get along they were LOUD and SCREECHING.  Then at the first store Bren had to touch every book on the shelves (Barnes and Noble) and Aiden wanted to get a bizarre Level 1 book that I knew I'd have to listen to a million times over.  No, put it back.  Next store, they start playing under a rack of clothes and 'hiding' in it.  Ugh.  Annoying.  We get back in the car and make a pit stop for gas and drinks.  Back in the car and they start fighting again because Brennan isn't finishing his snack and Aiden is still hungry and wants it.  We take off and I am not 100% sure which back roads I'm supposed to take to get to the locker so I'm trying to read the map and watch for signs by myself because no one else in the car knows how to.  So I'm super frazzled by the time we get there.  We load up the meat and I decide to call Andy to double check that the soccer cleats I got are actually soccer cleats.  All of a sudden the boys are screaming in the backseat at each other.  I put the phone down, turn around and give them a good old fashioned butt chewing.  I pick the phone back up and, thank goodness, Andy's laughing at me which makes me laugh and calms me down.  I was about to pull over and start walking home alone!  We stop back in the big 'big city' and have lunch at my favorite Mexican restaurant.  Of course Bren has to go to the bathroom (why I didn't think to take them both before being seated I don't know) so Aiden insists he can stay at the table alone.  Oh boy.  I tell him that if someone comes up and says that I asked them to get him to tell them no, because I would never do that.  We get back to the table and thank goodness he's still there.  Then they start playing around with every condiment on the table, knowing full well we don't approve of that business.  Get done, back in the car and they start playing with the straws in their cups.  By itself this is probably no big deal, but I was so frazzled and stressed by this point that I took their cups and dumped the contents out the window as I'm driving down the street.  Poor kids, they have a terrible mom.  We made it home and they both went to bed for naps.  I needed a break.  I still feel on edge.  I wish I had more patience for things like this. 

This probably sounds like a bunch of rambling, and I'm sorry if this isn't coherent at all.  I just needed to get that all out.  Again, I wish I had more patience with them.  I wish I wasn't one of those mom's that expected perfect behavior from them and just let them be kids.  Seriously, what was it hurting that they were dragging their straws in and out of their cups and getting themselves wet?  They were the ones who would suffer from that, not me, so why not let them have their fun?  I just expect so much from them. I see other parents that let their kids do whatever they want and it seems those kids turn out just fine.  Part of it for me is that I'm terrified if I let them do whatever they want they'll turn into disrespectful kids who turn to drugs and alcohol as teens.  They are good boys and I know they are, I need to not be so hard on them.  Erg, the frustrations of parenthood!  God, give me patience!

Another busy weekend ahead for our clan.  How about you?

Thanks for listening to the rantings of a tired, stressed mommy. 
Erin